Sun 28 Apr 2002 09:19
while the intervening hours have been instructive,
I have missed you.

Nose-picking issue may have been resolved: A&D ointment inside the nose, softens, smooths things up, and removes/greatly reduces incentive to pick.

It will be nice to leave that discussion behind.

p37 from At a journal workshop. Ira Progoff
on the group experience:
When we are working in a group situation, we must allow that as a person moves through the cycles of life, there is a change from moment to moment in the inner conditions that will best nurture growth. Multiplying this by each of the individuals participating in the workshop gives us a seemingly impossible number of special needs to harmonize in the group. But we find that we are able to harmonize the multiplicity of special personal requirements simply and naturally by enabling each person to go down to the underflow level of human experience in his own terms. Each goes through the well of his or her own life to the depth level that is beyond the well and beyond the person.

p37
In the course of a workshop, it sometimes happens that the Journal entry which a person reads expresses a difficulty or a painful problem in his life. He or she may become upset, distraught, or tearful while reading it. How shall we respond?

We may feel that being neutral outsiders we see the solution to the person's problems and we wish to help by giving advice.

p38 But if we do really wish to help we will maintain our good wishes in silence. We will preserve the space and freedom that will enable each person to find answers to problems in the rhythm that each life requires. If allowed to have the leeway in which to experience both the pain and the searching, he or she will eventually not only be able to solve the problem, but something much more meaningful will take place. He or she will be able to hear the larger message for life and consciousness that the problem is trying to disclose. In the course of discovering this, each of us will also be strengthening the inner muscles of our psyches. This is of greatest importance, since it is this that enlarges a person's capacity for further growth.

Because we follow the principle of honoring the integrity of each person's inner process, we restrain ourselves from graciously giving our advice and gidance in a workshop. We keep or own counsel, and thus we give one another a far greater gift, the gift of freedom and time. We also give one another the silent support that comes from trusting the self-healing wisdom of life. There is great power in this that cannot be put into words. By our silent restraint, we express not only our love for the other person, but also our respect for the integrity of the life process at work in each of us. This is a most basic rule to follow in a Journal Workshop.

In a similar way, it sometimes happens that a person who is working in the Journal at a workshop is moved to tears, even to heavy sobbing. Then also we may feel an urge to rush over with our loving hugs and caresses, to tell that person that we care and that everything will be all right. But should we do that with our intentions so pure and full of love, we may actually be preventing the person we wish to help from fulfilling the needs that his sobs are expressing. We must hold firm to our fundamental awareness that the psyche knows what needs to be done, that it will eventually do it in its own authentic timing, and that we have the responsibility to protect its freedom to move through it necessary cycles.

A person who cries at a workshop may have been waiting for many years to gain the courage and strength that would enable him to release the long-stored pains of sadness in life. If we rush in with our embraces and assurances, we will close off the space in which he can express those old emotions. Our good intentions may then stifle the open expression that was just beginning to be strong enough to let itself be heard.

p39
it may have been the death of a part of our lives that was cut short before it could grow.

such spontaneos mourning is the internal ritual that is necessary before a person can be freed to take the next step in his life.

Sobs may rack a person's body, and the wails of sadness may have an eerie sound.

What is necessary is that each person in the workshop remain quietly in his or her own well, reaching within toward the underground stream that sustains us all. Feeling that quietness and stability in the group, the mourning person finds that the waves of pain go past their crest. Passing their crest, they gradually subside. Soon he or she begins to feel quiet again with a sense of having been carried by something greater.

p40
He now possesses a direct knowledge of what is involved in passing through "the valley of the shadow," reemerging, coming up the mountainside again.

Having been left free to express inner pain, the person has begun to learn of the process and power in the depth of his or her own life. In the future, therefore, he or she may be able to rely upon it, and even trust in it.

p40
We let each person follow the integrity of our inner promptings. We leave it to him or her to decide whether or not to readh--now or later--and whether or not to speak in the workshop at all.

p41 There are some experiences that are so delicate that they would break if they were spoken aloud. And there are some experience that cannot be told without violating the integrity of a larger principle in one's life.

p41 repositioning one's life through gaining a new time perspective by means of the process.

p42 From being at a dead stop, his experience of working in the Journal at the workshop set him into motion upon a new path without his consciously or deliberately choosing it.

p42 The presence of the other members of the group gave him strength, and the atmosphere of the group quieted his nerves.

p42 the intensity of his use of the Journal in the workshops had had the effect of crystallizing the multitude of his jumbled thoughts and feelings into a singe perception of his life.

p42 In the course of the sustained Journal exercises in the workshops, decisions he could not make by conscious thought had seemed to form by themselves.

p43 His jangled nerves and anxieties would not have permitted him to concentrate and devote himself to the work for a sufficient length of time.

The presence of the others, each working on his own, strengthened his resolve and enabed him to return to his central task whenever his attention wandered.

he felt that a tone of love in the room rose up around the persons present while they concentrated on their individual work and reached into the depth of themselves. This love he felt as a mode of communication that did not require him to speak.

By now the Journal had established itself in his consciousness as an instrument that was securely his to use.

2002-04-28-1520
from At a Journal Workshop, 1992, Ira Progoff
p44
It will become a companion, a portable alter ego, and an intimate friend who will respond and discuss with you in dialogue the decisions of your life.
very similar to a musician's relationship with his instrument.

A major part of the meaning of life is contained in the very process of discovering it.

p46 positioning yourself in the present: the period log
As we wait for the workshop to start we sit in stillness. We let our breathing become progressively slower and deeper. We regard the workshop as a pause in the active, outer movement of or lives. It is a time of sabbath, a time of quietness in which a new inner movement can begin. We take a few minutes now to sit in silence, out thoughts at rest, waiting to begin to work in the depth and magnitude of our lives.
o

2002-04-28-1712
I feel so wrong
Joanna is coming-
I should get out and walk around/run.

from At a Journal Workshop, 1992, Ira Progoff
p46
we stretch the present moment back as far as it needs to go in order to include as much of the past as is still an active part of the present.
Our now moment is elastic.

p48 Let us begin by closing our eyes, relaxing, and quietly, inwardly,
feeling the movement of our lives. We let ourselves feel the implications of the question, "Where am I now in my life?" We let the answer to this shape itself only in general terms behind our conscious minds. We do not direct ourselves into thinking about it deliberately, but we let ourselves inwardly feel the movement of our life as it has been taking shape in this presnt period.

As we do this, the boundaries and characteristics of this present period in our life take shape for us. We find that we are now able to give spontaneous answers to the question of what is this present period in my life? What events mark it off? How far back does it reach? What have been the main characteristics of this recent period?

We hold ourselves in a condition of openness in which no particular thoughts are dominating our minds. We are silent. Thoughts may come, but they are not any particular thoughts. They are not directed thoughts. They are not thoughts we consciously seek. They are thoughts that simply come to us. We let them come, and we let them go. They will soon return to us, but in the form of images.

Perhaps they will take the form of an image, a metaphor, a similie, or some spontaneous adjective that describes it in a word.

p49
We are in silence, our eyes closed, feeling this recent period in the movement of our lives.

Whatever form it takes,
Do not reject or censor it. Neither should you affirm it; certainly you should not interpret it.

Take a few moments now to record it briefly in the Period Log of your Intensive Journal workbook.

To encourage spontaneity, therefore, it is best for the entries in the period log to be brief and direct without amplification and without premeditation.

--
Now, I'll make myself a journal-- for now, It will be simply text at the very bottom of this page.

2 0 0 2-04-28-1753
wow, I didn't think this would work so well?
(1) I see this place, this neighborhood where I live now, the time beginning when I moved into this room.
(2) I see Joanna, the time beginning when I was ending spending time at the dance studio, and when she arrived.
(3) I see this computer, and my very recent change in how I think of my relationship to it/to software/to what I do with it.

I want to comment, though not supposed to that (u's and f's on this keyboard aren't working well) that scope seems so limited, ignoring expansive horizons of geographical space.

--
hmm, the images described by Ira in the text are much more abstract.

p50
Still another person neither sees nor hears an image, but feels a movement of emotions within herself.

p50
"It has been like walking along a desert road and not seeing any trees."

p51
When we allow words to come to us without thought in this way, they often say a great deal to us about our lives. And they say it in a very cogent form. They are verbal images.

--
try 2:
just a feeling of quietness and peace.


p51
Now, after preparing ourselves by working at the nonconscious level, we are ready to focus more specifically on the contents of this recent period in our life.

When did this period start?
Is there an event that we identify with the beginning of this period?

p51 It may not be a memory of the event that started the period, but the memory that started the period, but the memory expresses the essence of the situation

p51 first closing our eyes to look inward for images, then letting the essence of the period express itself in a metaphor

p52 now we are ready to work consciously again.

Performance state

What memories?
Special events?
Arguments, angers, physical fights?

events of friendship, of loving, spiritual or physical loving?
family relationships, work involvements, social activities?
were inner experiences important?
striking experiences of a spiritual or artistic or extra-sensory type?

Do you recall dreams from the period?
Dreams that continue to return?

Strange or uncanny events, coincidences or psychic events that seem to have a meaning for you?
Strong religious experiences during this time?
inspirations, great new ideas?
times of great good luck or of misfortune?
physical illnesses?

Whatever comes to us as a memory relating to this period is to be written in our Journal in the Period Log section. entries are to be brief.

p53 In general, however, it is best to limit or Period Log entries to the essential factual description of our experiences.
In active journal feedback we can explore them more extensively.

p54 It will draw us off into the type of experience that characterizes ordinary journal or diary writing; then we will lose access to the special reintegrative powers which the Journal Feedback process provides.

p54 A Journal Checklist
2 approaches to gathering data in our Period Log.
(1) recapitulate the occurences of the period spontaneously as we have done, drawing upon the memories that come to mind.

--so different- the seeing of someone regularly, say at swimming, and the more special arrangements.

(2) review the events of the period briefly but systematically. We refresh our memory by using certain of the feedback sections as checkpoints recalling to our attention the relevant contents of this period in our life.

p54 over the period that you have marked off,
let yourself now recall the relationships with individuals that have been important during this time. They need not have been pleasant or satisfying.
Name of person, comments.

p55 What work projects or outer activities were important to you? frustrations, tensions related to work/lack of work?

various phases and changes through which it passed. hopes and plans and difficulties? present situation?

p55 physical aspect of your life at this time: health or illness? events with respect to diet or athletics or love-making or drugs or enjoyment of nature. record and add brief comment if necessary.

p55 social or political issues? Your belies or groups identifications called into question? A strong experience with respect to music or drama or any of the other artforms?

p55 events, particularly striking or dramatic or meaningful?
Single event that changed the course of your life experience? accident/good fortune? coincidence? esp? religious exp?

p56 When you have made the brief entries to record the contents and occurences of this recent period that are recalled to your mind by using this checklist, your basic entry in the Period Log will be complete. without judgement, without censorship.
you draw together an outline picture of this recent time in your life. specific contents, but not the details.
It is our first step toward positioning ourselves in the larger movement of our lives and drawing our life experience into focus.

here goes.

how can ideas best be communicated? most efficiently, most freely, most clearly.


2 0 0 2-04-28-1919
details.
start: even before moving to 137th st.
in brooklyn, in room, peace, quiet.

since then:
new job,
moving,
cunysoc app.
bev, peter, nathan, orly, crissy, ed, anthony, carmen, joanna, sara(h), dana, visits home, hal, yoga at work.
mod soc theory, wilber, george & ?, alex grey, Dee Hock, etc.

times square in the freezing cold
runs with nathan.
talks with anne-emotions of that interaction, insecurity.
emotions of carmen interaction
dance experiences.
walks
even earlier- 9/.. and walks with peter and urban.
camps on staten island

striking experiences? dreamer vision. Joanna, beauty of RB state park,
peace of the pool edge.

post joanna subway ride.
post-dance class/etc, nice feeling.
sleep.
the beats on the slanted vent cover at columbia.
the bible students
the protesters.
rachael.
night runs
tenniscourt dance.
etc..


p57
Twilight imagery and Life Correlation
Twilight Imaging, the intermediate state between waking and sleeping, enables us to reach the symbolic images contained in our depths.

Having completed our basic entry in the Period Log, we sit in stillness again.
previously our attention was directed toward the memory level of our minds.
it was turned away from the depth levels where our deeper-than-conscious intuitions occur.

we wish to have acces to the direct awareness, hunches, and inspirations that come from our nonrational depths.

p57 reapproach the present period of our life from a depth point of view. We do this by means of Twilight Imagery.

The key to Twilight Imagery
takes place in the twilight state between waking and sleeping.

p58 As long as its essential guidelines are observed, authentic creative contact and spiritual awareness can be gained.
flow of imagery being neither manipulated nor directed.

p59 We do not put the imagery there, just as we do not put our dreams there.we follow the direction of their movement without

we describe them as we perceive them.


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