Wed 04 Sep 1996 13:00
I wonder what lise has in mind.
Lise.

I hallucinate now. The blue sky turns white and the white clouds turn into blue. I smell the cool air.

Time and time again.

I wonder what lise is thinking.

9.4 2200
Emotionally independent.
you don't do a good job deciding it that way, not the best way to work it out.

Emotionally independent.
There is no such thing. There is only a diversity or plenty of people to care about.

Instead of relying on only one.

I am not sure I know what you mean. What is so special about the single intimate bond, or is it sort of illusion as the others.

We want the other but we can get by on this other, I don't know why.

I wonder what I look like to her, I suppose I could ask. She looks fine. I think I see a little question though. What do you say.

And I was going to say, holy montezuma, how much time is too much, and what does she say.

Let me see you shoot the moon!
What do you say?...

how much time is too much, can there ever be. Emotional independence.

Yeah, since her, there is a pervasive, well relative security. It was a little tough last night dealing with myself, but nothing so dramatic as with Kr.

I wonder what she gets. She starts to calm down now, I think.

And I was a little ridiculous. It would be cool if you came. It sounds like..

Well there, I don't know, and my guess is, you don't either.

Food will need to be taken, or somehow procured, as it is early, maybe. I won't get to swim though, I could take oranges and tfu.

Fine, then, fine, fine, Well, that's o.k.

this, then Amy, friday, sometime. Maybe, time. I don't know how long.

There.

The meeting today was fine. She talking of daydreaming. Feel. She thinks there are two kinds. Fine.

It seems like I am in a state of security now. I don't like it terribly much. I do like passion, tension, drama, angst, euphoria. And the security levels the ride of emotions out.

Kristen could bring it back, I guess.

I don't like emotional security. How will I get my thrills if all my needs are met, this surface.
the needs are not met if the passion is still needed.

Emotional independence is a poor thing. What do you think.
Emotional independence.

It is good to be so dependent on being able to visit Rebecca.

The passion.
It is good to need to talk to Kristen so much, to tell her what I am thinking of her. or that I am loving.

And love.


It was incredible ecstacy to walk down that street with sara, to visit kyle, to watch mollie and chloe in that shed, to be with them.

Ecstacy. Fine. Crime. Crying. crew and Kristen. Bob and sailing and soccer, and Eric and sailing and rockclimbing and Kelly and wife and violin in the other room. The writing I lost last night, the mood, the pointless typing lost, and now you do not know.

That this man has something he can give, that what he figures means, but realize it, would you read another's , would you read another's and would you have them read it. It is for your self and time. Only, entirely for yourself. say.

Kyle. Then and love.

Ecstacy.

To experience the ecstacy, the constant state, sorry folks it is possible to stand, in, love.
and I know.
Kyle, third grade.

The maintenance of euphoria, of intensity is possible, only who will.

Let us go for it, let us try what was it, kyle, can you help me out.

What association will bring it back. What association will bring it back, like the hands in the grain and the feel of the womb and the powerful experience of knowing love.

So find the passion, ecstacy, euphoria, intensity and find the permanence.

You can let it all go, you can follow along, and you can die, slowly on your own feeling fine.

The wandering way is not the universal way, there is a knowing, or is the wandering universal.

I said, this wandering is a function of our specialization.
I said, there is time wrong with these theoris and I wanted to show you my classicly poor production because it is love that you argue.

It is the need to feel that some how you contribute, she says, translation, job.
yeah.

The need to feel that somehow you contribute.

We are the source of all significance, and remind yourself, that the the feeling you somehow contribute is your own internal attitude as a function of your interaction with self and others.
go on , go on.

I do contribute as I speak with you. And it smells like warming wet wool and of skiing. And how do you think.

It was incredible to be with you Buzz, you said, You are doing something you think to help other people, and I say, myself,

But it is so good to talk to you.

I hope this is not a problem what I say about this focus on finding a  like a fire, this focus on finding a way, a job I guess.


What is it that I do, and does what I do matter?
The scientific procedure and the self awareness.

You cannot have the feeling separate without the rationality because both parts exist.

And where is my focus here, does it matter. Take your religion, you could argue, take your homeless time.

Please come, I want you to.

The biological physical way and the intuitive way,

combined.

Thursday is frisbee day.

kristen and concentration, do you have the time, do you she have the time?

And the need to get it done, take the time.

vengeance, I want her to talk to me but it is time.


how much time is too much, it is a physical need, like I could eat forever if I did not get sick, I could stay with you all the time, if I did not get sick.

There is a time we can be together, and there is a time we are too much together. What do you say sara? Why did things go that way.

And how is there the passion, the extreme chemical reaction, the sustained high?

how is there the passion. It is concentration on the absolute beauty of what we do on the moment, see the time feel the time, see the light, feel the light on her face through the leaves of the tree as she walks along there, singing softly as she makes, what is it? a paper cup of flower print filled with dirt and maybe a flower. Did you feel.

Heck, do you remember kyle, what was it, can you help me out here because this is what I am trying to bring back. It could be all this association.

Let's go back. Well, how about ahead, why am i trying to recreate the past in the present.
It is a worthy challenge, but is it progress? have we really gone backward, as we get older.

And this change in realization in awareness, we are not kids playing any more and can we be. Who are we who is this time, what do you feel, and do not leave the questions behind. What does she feel, do not forget the time.

The own individual as the greatest contributor.

She says psychology, so maybe, here I go.

passion, intensity, concentration, That i was more able to concentrate then. How could i remember it if it never existed.

The physical is one way to communicate, other.

.